i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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