Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
