I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
