i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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