Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Randomize
