The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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