Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
