I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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