I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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