So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I'm at about main and main street
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize