guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
