if you like me you must not know who I am
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
