I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Two words: nipple clamps
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