weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
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