I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
