I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
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