I just made out with a guy for $7.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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