every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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