the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Randomize
