Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Randomize
