How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize