He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
