People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Randomize
