the condom got lost in my hair
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize