you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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