i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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