I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
