I bet he comes in French.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Randomize
