Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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