Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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