So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
