I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
