OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I could fuck to npr.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Randomize
