well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
