Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
