and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
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