U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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