I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
