we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
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