i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
