After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
pray to the hookup gods
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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