How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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