How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
