Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
