I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
