also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I hope mine doesn't look like that
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
