I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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