No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
Randomize
