your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
