and you said cock pushups were impossible
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize